Figuring Out Your Birth Philosophy for A Better Birth

I’m sure if you’re here you have probably thought at least a little bit about how you “hope” your birth might go. But how do you know what you really want out of it?  Of course, a healthy baby and momma are key, but what else?

The thing to start with is figuring out your birth philosophy.  What is that?!  The way you think birth is meant to or “should” be.  Some people believe that birth is best done in a controlled environment with skilled providers ready to help birth be as easy and painless as possible. Others believe that our bodies grew the baby, they know how the baby needs to be birthed with minimum to no assistance from outside influences, including providers.  Still others believe that birth can be a beautiful sacred experience where both parents feel empowered no matter how baby needs to be born because they are respected, heard, and informed. Anything in between those examples could be your birth philosophy.

So, how do you decide where you stand in your birth philosophy? You can ask yourself the questions below to help you determine what your birth philosophy includes.

How do I feel about birth as a normal, natural process?

How do I want to cope with the pain of childbirth?  Medication, movement, water, etc?

Who Do I want there?

Where do I feel most safe or most at peace when I think about having my baby?

Do I have some anxiety about pain or childbirth? If yes, will learning more through a childbirth class ease that anxiety or make it worse?

Who do I trust to care for myself and my baby through pregnancy? OB, midwife?

Now there are pros and cons of all philosophies of birth. At SJ Childbirth Education & Doula Services we believe that clients should never feel judged because of their birth philosophy or choices. They should never feel bad or make choices on what their doula will think. If a cesarean is what you need to help your anxiety about the unknowns of birth, we will support that and make sure it’s a special experience for you.  If you want an epidural because you know you can’t do the pain, by all means we will help and support you in that. If you want a home birth with a midwife and no other medical tools, we will support you in that.  If plans change for you, we will be there to hold your hand and help you navigate the next steps. That’s our job, and we love it! 

Next week, we’ll talk about differences in providers and how the provider you choose can effect your birth experience.

Tell us about your birth philosophy! We’d love to connect with you!

Childbirth Education: Being Prepared for Birth

How many times have you looked back on an experience or situation and thought, “If I knew then what I know now, I would have done ___ different.” Or “Knowing that would have helped ______ months/years ago!”  

    I have definitely felt that way at times, but none more than with my first few birth experiences.  Being a mother of five children and one angel baby, I have had a range of birth experiences, and when it comes to birth,  preparation really does matter.

     Knowledge is power.  The power to choose, and not just accept.  The power to be proactive, instead of reactive.  The power to change fear and doubt, into faith and trust.  My desire to prepare better for my fourth birth brought me all of that power.

    My goal was an unmedicated birth. I found THE BEST birth class and childbirth educator in my area.  I read books, joined Facebook groups, and researched doulas.   I switched providers at 28w.  I was determined.  This birth was going to be different.  

     It was different, but in more ways than I thought it would be. I had changed.  Instead of relying on someone else to know “what was best for me and my baby“, I felt prepared to make those decisions for myself because of the knowledge I had worked to gain and the preparations I had made. 

     My biggest obstacle was fear of the unknown pain.  I thought I couldn’t handle the pain, but really it was my fear of not knowing what was going on with my own body. I feared how uncontrollable it felt. Even though I had taken a hospital birth class, I still had fear around what and how this phenomenon was going to happen. I feared my body because even though I had bee taught the basic physiology I had never been shown that this was how the body was made and how it worked to get my baby out.  That I played a vital role in that process.  That my choice to let go of my fear, and trust in my God given, God designed body, in my providers knowledge and wisdom, and my amazing support system, was vital to my perception of the experience.

     I loved that birth.  Not just because I birthed a baby (which is an amazing feat by the way), but because I had taken the time to replace my fear of the unknown with knowledge. Knowledge not just about birth but about myself. 

     I believe that nothing except giving birth can prepare you for the unexpected in birth because everyone is so different. I also believe that every woman regardless of their choice of birth or desired birth, should be given the chance to learn about their amazing body and be prepared in case they don’t get to have the birth experience they want (wether that’s an unmedicated home birth or a scheduled cesarean).  Being prepared can help all involved feel greater joy and love in this life changing experience.

Contact us to learn about our childbirth education classes and how they might help you!

Frequently Asked Questions

What does a doula do?

A doula is a non-medical support person. As a doula, I provide clients with the emotional, informational, and physical support they may need to help them have the best birth experience for them. Whether your goals are a cesarean birth, epidural birth, unmedicated, home birth or any variation of that, I can provide the extra support you need.

I like to compare my job to that of a wilderness guide. You choose the type of birth you want and I help you navigate all the twists and turns and choices to get there. I stand by the choices you make and provide the knowledge you need when unexpected things come up. I provide continuous labor support. While a medical provider may have lots of other patients, policies, and things to worry about, my soul purpose is to be the calming influence you desire to support you throughout your pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.

What do you do if I want an epidural?

I support you in your choice to have an epidural and help you through all of the what ifs. What if the epidural anesthesia doesn’t work as expected? What if it takes a while for the epidural to be placed? What if I get to the hospital too late to have an epidural? Having the continued emotional support from someone who has been through this type of experience can be extremely comforting.

What if I choose to have a scheduled cesarean birth?

I support you in your choice to have a cesarean birth and help you prepare for the possible outcomes of that surgery. On the day of the birth, I will be there in case your baby needs to go to the NICU and your partner accompanies him or her. I will stay to support you while you recover. I will also be there to help with your partner’s worries or anxieties about the procedure, baby, etc.

What does a Postpartum doula do?

I help you formulate goals around your postpartum health and facilitate the implementation required to achieve or adapt those goals as time progresses. I can assist in Infant care and feeding, light house cleaning or day to day tasks, I’m there to listen to you, and more. I’m a knowledgeable guide in helping you through this sometimes difficult and isolating time.

What does a doula cost and why do you not post pricing for doula packages on your site?

I believe that everyone should have the support they need, by the person that will be able to support them best. This means that having a consult first allows us to get to know each other without worrying about price. In addition, it allows me the opportunity to tailor a package to best fit your needs.